Tried all of the above - without success!
Having discussed the problem in more detail with my dealer, they suspected that the problem may have something to do with my Starcom system being connected through the ignition rather than directly to the battery as recommended (they fitted the starcom in the first place!).
We agreed I'd take it round to them this morning (Saturday) and they'd re-connect the Starcom directly to the battery. Duly completed.
Got home, went through the the "pre-Charge checklist" (as described above by Orca the Porker and had a red charge light, HOWEVER, as soon as the canbus powered down, the red "charging light" went off to be replaced by the red error light!!!!
That's it! I've had enough! I've since connected an Optimate lead directly to the battery and I've just been out to the garage to see a wonderful GREEN light!
BMW Charger bought at a cost of £75 squid will be returned to my dealer for a full refund on Monday......
Why do BMW have to *loody complicate things so much????