You can leave your hat on

[Aidan1150]

Paddy is passing by Mick's hay shed one day when through a gap in the door
he sees Mick doing a slow and sensual striptease in front of an old red
Massey Ferguson.

Buttocks clenched he performs a slow pirouette and gently slides off first
the right welly, followed by the left.

He then hunches his shoulders forward and in a classic striptease move lets
his braces fall down from his shoulders to dangle by his hips over his
corduroy trousers.

Grabbing both sides of his check shirt he rips it apart to reveal his tea
stained vest underneath and with a final flourish he hurls his flat cap on
to a pile of hay.

"What the feck are you doing Mick" says Paddy.

"Jeez Paddy, ye frightened the livin bejasus out of me, says an obviously
embarrassed Mick: "but me and the Missus been having some trouble lately in
the bedroom department, and the Therapist suggested I do something sexy to a tractor".

 

[JimmyC]

Paddy is passing by Mick's hay shed one day when through a gap in the door
he sees Mick doing a slow and sensual striptease in front of an old red
Massey Ferguson.

Buttocks clenched he performs a slow pirouette and gently slides off first
the right welly, followed by the left.

He then hunches his shoulders forward and in a classic striptease move lets
his braces fall down from his shoulders to dangle by his hips over his
corduroy trousers.

Grabbing both sides of his check shirt he rips it apart to reveal his tea
stained vest underneath and with a final flourish he hurls his flat cap on
to a pile of hay.

"What the feck are you doing Mick" says Paddy.

"Jeez Paddy, ye frightened the livin bejasus out of me, says an obviously
embarrassed Mick: "but me and the Missus been having some trouble lately in
the bedroom department, and the Therapist suggested I do something sexy to a tractor".

Must remember that one........................



A Massey's classy...

But a Zetor's better................

 

[Ogmios]

 

[NeverRodeBefore]

I'm already putting my coat on for this one...

Brian loved farming and all things associated with it, despite not actually living in the countryside. As a child every spare bit of pocket money went on his toy farm. As he grew he started a subscription to Farmers weekly, keeping every copy. Realising that he would never have the necessary space for 'real' equipment he decided to build models, initially from kits, but then from his own plans.

One day his long suffering wife snapped that enough was enough when he had got up in the middle of the night as the weather and crop were perfect on his farming simulator game on the PC. "All of it has to go, every scrap of it, all the magazines, the models and most certainly the game off the PC... or I'm going" said his wife.

Given that ultimatum he boxed it all up and got rid of it. His wife was happy, and the neighbours no longer laughed at him as he sold his ride on mower (which was too big for his garden).

After some months, Brian was watching TV when he heard his wife scream that the kitchen was on fire... he jumped up, ran into the kitchen, threw a wet tea towel over the chip pan and with one mighty inhale, sucked up all the smoke, and then blew it out of the kitchen door. His wife stands in amazement and asks him how he managed to do that....




"It was easy..... after all I'm an extractor fan"