Morts spring scrounging tour 2010

[Mort]

Are you sitting comfortably? then I'll begin

I had been let down by the Icelantic public, not only had they tried to steal some of my stash last year they had now "set off" a volcano just to upset European travel, A nasty breed of people if ever there was one.
Then an idea hit me on Saturday night, a small amount of alcohol had beeen taken by myself purely for medicinal reasons so I posted this thread http://www.ukgser.com/forums/showthread.php?t=226752&highlight=scrounging
and the rest as they say is now history.

Monday, the 19th of April 2010

I knew where I was heading for, all the phone numbers were stored in my phone as well as written in a book next to the addresses I was heading for.
I knew a good breakfast was essential to set me up for the day ahead and I had planned ahead. On Sunday night I only ate half the 12" chicken tika pizza so the rest of that washed down with a couple of cups of coffee and away we go.
As I was pushing the bike out of the garage there was a funny noise coming from the rear of the bike "bugger, here we bloody go, final drive is knackered " on closer inspection the small "made in Hull" bracket that held the romote reservoir for the Ohlins shock had snapped and it was dangling in the back wheel it must have happened very close to home on Sunday as there were only a couple of marks on the adjustment knob. 5 minutes later I had fashioned a new one out of some top box mounts (they should have had me on the long way round)
Right then, bike packed, trip re-set and away we go.

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I didn't have a route planned as such, just a general direction, so I set the 660 to compass and just headed South West. Within 20 miles I was on roads I'm ashamed to say I'd never been on before, it was now raining and I had a smile on my face.

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I ended up riding through some roads I'd just been on the day before and popped in to see Paul Nichols for a coffee in Ingleton to see the new garage he was having built a year ago.....here he is next to his new (1 year old) garage

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It was now a little later than I had planned for so I headed to Lancaster then on the M6 to make up some time. I made up time better than expected and arrived at Tarka's house half an hour early, he eventually answered the door soaking wet and wrapped in his dressing gown as is traditional in this part of the world where's that bloody camera when I need it )
Tarka then dried himeself, made us a coffee and showed me "the collection"

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It was his suggestion that he gave me a tour of the area in the chair of one of his Ural combo's. I agreed readily to this and as you can see enjoyed it immensely.

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The Wirral has some stunning buildings, I can see why Liverpudlians aspire to live there once they have stolen enough money to retire on.

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We stopped for the best fish and chips ever and I mean ever there isn't a photo of that as I just dived in and stuffed my face
On the way back to Tarka's we were just about to go past a off licence when he screetched to a halt and ran in screaming, "Lambrini, Lambrini"

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The assistant says it happens all the time with him

We then went back to the house where he showed me to my room

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Not what I expected but beggers can't be choosers

The lovely Glambabe popped round later in the evening and we ended sitting up intil nearly 2am watching some mental european hillclimbers trying and indeed succeeding to destroy their bikes.
Night night then

Miles today 169


Tuesday the 20th of April 2010

After getting to bed at nearly 2am it was nice to get a lie in until 5am so I awoke bright eyed and bushy tailed
Steve pointed me in the right direction, put the bike in gear and let me go into the darkness.
I made a winding route to Llangollen, I knew that I had entered Wales as they must have used up all the vowels on the English and Scottish road signs, I also seen a sign for somewhere which must have had every letter in the alphabet in it plus a few others I'd never seen before.

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I also discovered where the end of the world is situated and it was nothing like what Douglas Adams wrote about.

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A quick call to Stewart H of this parish and a text to Hairnet 600 and I was ensconced in his living room drinking coffee...lots of coffee as my mind and body were now thinking of waking up and the rest of me coming off autopilot.
We had a ride through the Horseshoe pass and breakfast at the pondarosa......with more coffee
I hadn't realised that Wales is 2 hours behind England in time as while eating breakfast Hairnet 600 texted that he had only just received his text message and sadly would be too late to join us, next time mate

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After breakfast.....did I mention I needed more coffee? ok then.
After breakfast I headed off through Wales, the weather was fantastic and the roads were great. As I was riding around some boot scraping corners I felt that the road was familiar, this was odd as I have only been to Wales three times before in my life! I then came accross the fuel station and Cafe where Sgt Bilco had taken us to on a ride from Sycomoto's August do. I had some more coffee

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I was now on my way to Devon to meet up with Bagerrrrrr (Mark) for my next stop over.
Mark is a family man, and to protect them all from the horror that is my snoring he made me very welcome........in the attic
We had a lovely BBQ with some beer (I was sick of Coffee by now)

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It was an early night for me as I was knackered so off to beddy bye byes.

Miles today 291

Wednesday the 21st of April 2010

I woke up fresh for real this time, only Mark was still in the house as everyone had set off to work early as none of them could sleep because of some strange noise coming out of the attic
We had breakfast, packed up my bike and set off to see Crapaud at his place.
Now I know Sids garage is world famous but bugger me you could fit my house in it. Sids sons 600 Fazer was being rebuilt after his crash and I'm happy to report that both rider and bike are doing well
Sid lives the dream, beautiful house in a fantastic setting, loads of bikes and all day to enjoy it all

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We then saddled up and set off for another famous insitution, Proffs house

We were met at the gate by the better half (Barb) who didn't want her photo taken

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We had a tour of his estate including his shed with all the bikes in. More coffee and chocolate ensued
We then followed the cloud of smoke that was Proff to see where his new tricycle is being made.

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As we set off for our next desination Proff got rather upset with a woman who was holding us up at a junction while on the phone, he pulled up next to her stuck his head through the window and shouted, "get off the f*cking phone" He then set off at one hell of a lick, I didn't know the old bugger had it in him then I realised why.....

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I got the special delivery sorted out for the North East event, bought a couple of gallons (and I mean gallons ) of cider and had a naughty little taste

We then set off on our seperate ways and I went East to meet up with John Plane. I stopped off at some little unknown shop to try their food but sadly the owner was away

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I passed Stone Henge which was stoney and rather henge like and onto Ascot.
Now Ascot supprised me a little as it seemed to be closed

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But that just turned out to be the race track so all was well and I arrived at Johns house bang on time
Did you know he is a painter and decorator?

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Here's John and his bike, they are going to be riding accross America later in the year, have a good trip mate

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Now me being a simple North country lad, I didn't know just how close Ascot is to Windsor. It was also the Queens birthday so we went to have a look and make sure the flag was up.....it was

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We then went to Johns local and had a great meal and a number of beers, just to see if we liked it In true tosser tradition we were the last to leave, the landlord even gave us one on the house to get rid of us.

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Back in a taxi to Johns house and an excellent snoring competition ensued.

Miles today 223

Thursday the 22nd of April 2010

First job this morning after a coffee was to get John and his van re-united back at the pub, we said our goodbyes and I set off on the road once again.
As I passed Ascot race course a man in a suit, going bald with a large nose and big sticky out ears flagged me down and told me he'd been following the scrounging thread on UKGSer and would like to offer me this.....

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I of course acceped on behalf of the site I'm looking forward to meeting the queen.

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Cheers John, without your invite that would never had happened

I was now on my way to see Ash, I knew I was getting close

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As ever, it was nice to meet up and I also got to meet his brother Darren. We chatted for a couple of hours and lunch was provided, cheers mate

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Some good news today, Badgerrrrr's son passed his bike test yesterday

Time to start heading North towards the A1 and meet up with Srace7 (Simon) and Susie.

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We had never met but we are both doing a charity ride for the Royal British Legion, 1000 miles within 24 hours so we had been in contact via PM in the past. The best way to start a friendship between two tossers is with alcohol. so the cider was opend

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I couldn't believe what happened next, the whole village came out to celebrate the fact that I'd been able to blag so much with so little effort on my behalf, the pub was crammed even Jeremy James was there, A hero of the highest standing in my book.

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And the staff were great in the Jolly Waggoner

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Someone tried to spoil my special night by telling me that the reason that they were all there was that the pub had just reopened after a re-fit and the beer was free........what a rotten thing to say

Another late night/early morning was occuring but the mix of cider, beer, wine and an excellent malt meant It was bed time for me.

Miles today 144

Friday the 23rd of April 2010

I woke up this morning to a beautiful sunny morning with the birds singing and the smell of bacon in the air. We had a smashing breakfast but I'm sure I was being watched somehow

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After a chat it was time to pack up the bike and hit the road once more. I filled up with petrol, set the garmin and off we go.

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I was too late to take up Johnny Boxers offer of tea and scones but I stopped off in Thirsk anyway and scrounged a coffee from Andy, the local bike shop owner.

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Then home via Sunderland to see how Gails bike service was getting on.

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Home at last.

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Miles today 245

A big, big thank you to all of you who have not only let me into your homes but also into your lives for a short while, I've had a ball.
To those who kindly offered but got off with it, I thank you too.
I know it was a bit cheeky to ask in the first place but it would have been downright rude to pick and choose who I stayed with. So the first four who offered a room were the people I stayed with.

Total mileage 1072


More photo's here http://s428.photobucket.com/albums/qq5/mort017/Morts spring scrounging tour/
__________________
Oops

 

[MacFarlane]

Argh

There all big now!

 

[Aidan1150]

Nice one Rob.

 

[Buz]

Wish i had seen the original thread, you must have passed close to me, did you go over one of the Severn Bridges? We're not for from the old one and could have arranged a meet up

 

[Mr K]

Nice one Rob.

...even the bit with Tarka in..

 

[Hairnet600]

top scrounge la

you shoulda videoed proff shouting at that woman

 

[Racey]

<a href="http://s428.photobucket.com/albums/qq5/mort017/Morts%20spring%20scrounging%20tour/?action=view&current=064-2.jpg" target="_blank"><img src="http://i428.photobucket.com/albums/qq5/mort017/Morts%20spring%20scrounging%20tour/064-2.jpg" border="0" alt="Photobucket"></a>

That looks familiar....

Got it !!!

<a href="http://picasaweb.google.com/lh/photo/kDB4vTb_Sk63UPE6z70J7FlryLBgrlkOKs7u25mnMgs?feat=embedwebsite"><img src="http://lh4.ggpht.com/_tyu_mgErIOA/S9KZjv-fdbI/AAAAAAAADnc/HiytkAi1MV4/s800/cat-in-the-hat-printable-invitation.jpg" /></a>

 

[Steve V]

Enjoyed that...the lad has know shame though

 

[Ash]

ugly buggars a plenty in this thread. .

 

[Racey]

ugly buggars a plenty in this thread. .

My Mrs won't take kindly to that Ash !! Best I don't let her read the thread eh ??

 

[Deeley]

Enjoyed that, sounds like a good time had by all...

 

[Crapaud]

Shows the true spirit of this site is alive and well after all.

Great day out.

 

[Stewart H]

Brilliant It looks like you had a great week, what a great idea to visit a bunch of tossers

Stewart

 

[Duchess]

Do you know, for something so 'off the cuff' and so last minute it all seemed to work so well and you probably had a better time doing this Mort than flying out abroad. Always a silver lining .....



Thats a great report Rob Thanks for sharing.

 

[Jazbee]

Excellent stuff Rob

 

[Tarka]

Just returned from a weekend at the Stafford show and caught up with this great report.

It was great to finally get to meet you,Mort...

I just knew Mr. K would appreciate the Lambrini photos ( ) and remember how we laughed like schoolkids when we took the photo of the inside of the signal box,saying how my living room looked a bit spartan,heh heh.

You`ve had a bit of an adventure and an enjoyable week there,I reckon.

Also it shows once again just how well the true and genuine members of this Forum can work together....well done everyone,I reckon.

So.....with me being the first overnight stop,is it my turn for a freeloader week next year ?

P.S. I`ve got a few pics that I`ll post asap...including the famous Fish and Chips.

 

[Mr K]

I'm still waiting for the fish & chip shots.....

 

[(RIP) Proff]

So am I
,Missus is on Polling officer duties, I've had to look after myself since 5.30am
10.35pm got to take her and the box to Oke' then home to beddybyes...

No chance of her cooking anything for me ......... selfish moo

 

[Tarka]

Okay OKAY OKAY OKAY !!!!



Somewhat belated due to being busy...and having a red wine addled memory...here is my words and pictures addendum to Mort`s Scrounging Tour 2010.

Mort and I had become masters at online digs at each other,seemingly constantly at odds in all posts,yet I felt that we`d get on fine if ever we met as there was a shared sense of mischief and 'wind up merchant'.
So,I duly offered a stay at Chateau Tarka which he gratefully accepted.

Thus,due to him arriving 20 minutes early and my shift working life being worked out to the minute,I was mid shower when he knocked on my door.
I hadn`t had any prior calls or texts off him so assumed his mobi was flat or he`d lost my numbers...so I felt that I couldn`t finish my shower and dress, and he would return again later if he had ridden off.
Thus I was near naked and covered in shower gel lather when we first met each other.

Worryingly,he was unpeturbed and happily entered my house...not even shaken by me locking the front door once inside.....
I told him to make himself comfy while I got sorted and dashed back upstairs to my shower....shouting down to him , "I assume you ARE Rob from UKGSer" to which we both had a giggle.

Anyway,once sorted we had a coffee and a good gab before I offered him a tour of the Wirral (the Southern half of it is rural and very pleasant,as you saw earlier in his photos).
As a break from riding his bike,and to make any chat easier,I proposed a Ural tour.
Also,rather than returning home on a nice evening,I suggested we sat out at Parkgate for THE BEST FISH AND CHIPS IN THE WORLD and he was delighted at the prospect.

I had pondered treating him to VIP transport in 'Dee' my super shiny posh 750 Ural but the thought of greasy paw prints all over her put me off that idea.

So,my faithful workhorse and beloved 'Skaya' 650 Ural was put to the task instead.
Mort was equally as delighted and unfazed anyway.......as you can see.

Once shoehorned aboard he looked quite at home.

We did about 25 miles along the country lanes and through the most picturesque villages before arriving at Parkgate .... once a port serving Ireland but now the River Dee estuary is almost fully silted up.
Parkgate exists on quite a bit of tourist money from the famous ice cream at Nicholls and also from our destination...TBCITW (The Best Chippy In The World).
I can catagorically state that their fish and chips is second to none.
Thin and crisp batter with a taste all its own.....perfectly cooked fluffy white fish and chompadelic chips.

Mort shows his approval.

Once the feast had settled,we cruised a few more lanes before going back to Chatea Tarka where Glambabe joined us for a hour or so as we finished off a perfect evening in the best possible way.

Mort...it was great to meet you.

 

[Mr K]

Splendid!