The other half of the Sand Up Your Bum Tour

Paul G (BHT)

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Friday/Sunday 30th March – 1st April

The trip down from Portsmouth to Bilbao was fairly calm, there was a force 9 storm out in the bay so the bloke with the steering wheel kept fairly close to mainland France to make it as smooth as possible.

During the evenings we decided to stay away from the Butlins brigade in Silverstones Bar and hit the ‘Posh Bar’ on the upper deck.

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We had an invite to James and Kevs room on Saturday night for a squeesy cheese, Ritz and G n T party.

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On Sunday morning once docked we headed south, destination… well as far South as possible really.

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About half way down Spain we were passed by StEptoe and two of his merry men, a little further down the road we met up with said crew and after a quick chat we resumed the route.

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By 21:30 we had managed to make it to San Roque which is about 10 miles from the ferry port of Algeciras so we booked in. Soon after Steptoes crew arrived.

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Monday 2nd April

MMOB arrived early morning and we departed about 09:30 and headed for the local supermarket to stock up on fresh food for the trip. Headed for the ferry port and crossed about 11:30

While on the ferry it was decided that the route that was originally planed needed to be changed and we should head for Marrakech that night.

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I agreed but during the trip down opted to go with the original plan. My Patrol was slow on the hills and was slowing the others down so Lucy, Ken and I diverted to Meknes to try and put us back on track for the original planed route.

We arrived at Meknes about 21:00 and booked into the hotel Ibis, the town of Meknes was alive with locals we later found out that there was a religious festival taking place to celebrate the birthday of a prophet.

Tuesday 3rd April

We left Meknes destination Merzouga.

There’s snow on them there hills :D
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The Patrol flight deck ;)
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And arrived at Merzouga across the piste (yes it is still there) where huge shadows were cast as the sun was falling low in the evening sky, the great Erg Chebi can be seen in the back ground.
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As the sun set we set up camp adjacent to Erg Chebi, Lucy and I were set up in about 10 minutes however, Ken had brought a mobile village with him and took the next 1 and a half hours to erect and advised us it would take the same amount of time to decamp!
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Wednesday 4th April

We were greeted by a beautiful sun rise in the morning and once Ken had dismantled his kit we were on our way….

The piste briefly turned to tarmac as we drove through Mezouga.
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Everything was going fine until we reached Ramila..
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oh dear, I thought I had the right route mapped through that place but was ‘slightly wrong’ We ended up in the very soft sand (fiche fiche) in the dried up river bed up to our axles. It was at this time that we discovered Kens winch was nothing more than a decoration on his Misubishi.
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After much digging of sand assisted by three local lads and with the use of the sand waffles (ladders) the big Patrol finally climbed it’s way out of the rut, one of local lads then rode shotgun on the side steps of the Patrol and gave us precise directions turn by turn back to the safety of Remlia.
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One there we were introduced to Mohamed who was the local English teacher, we sat and drank mint tea and chatted about our trucks and motorcycles. I happened to mention about UKGSer.com and to my amazement he knew all about the place…………….
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After drinking mint tea Mohamed then gave us a guided tour of the village gardens and a burber house.
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One of the local lads then rode with Lucy and I and guided us through the soft sand
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But this time it was Kens turn to get stuck.
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Once the Mitsubishi was dug out we headed for the next next village with our guide where we stopped again for another mint tea session.

We then continued for a while before the Mitsubishi was in trouble again, this time the Kenlowe electric fan decided to pack up, luckily Ken had brought the standard viscous fan and the was soon bolted on and allowed us to continue.
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After continuing a short was setting up camp on the piste midway between Remlia and Zagora. This time Ken decided to opt for the more simplistic approach to camping and set up his hammock (seen in the background). But during the night he was rudely awoken up by one of the tie knots slipping :D
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Thursday 5th April

We awoke to yet another gorgeous sunrise.
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And another early start enabled us to continue along the piste to Zagora and on to Foum Zagouid, last few miles of which are a graded piste.

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We came across there 3 brits (one was a girlie) who had brought their DRZs down to Erfoud in a Transit and were spending a few days riding the pistes
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Approaching Tamegroute
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Road hogs :D
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Another dried up river bed crossing
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The small rocks started to turn into footballs
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Burber nomad camp
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“Bon bon madame”… next time more bags of sweets are definitely on the packing list
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Another ‘river‘ crossing
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…and another
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Friday 6th April


Foum Zagouid to Tafroute, 403 miles, a long fairly boring day, ended up going 70 mile off intended course got to Assa before we realised we had gone too far South, headed North and got stopped by the local gun toting plod. Stayed 50 kilometres South of Tafroute.
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The views from the pool side were spectacular but unfortunately the water was still a little cold this time of year
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Saturday 7th April

After an early breakfast it was time to depart and and head for Marrakech. On the old road out of Taftoute.
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It soon started to deteriorate and become very difficult with very narrow rocky sections many of which have suffered the torrential rain of last winter.
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Getting up that rocky step wasn't as easy as it looks, there was also a huge drop just to the right of the photo :eek:
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Before long we came to the end of the road, an 8 foot section of the piste had been completely washed away and prevented us from continuing any further, there was no option but to return to Tafroute.
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Once back in the town we met a local that Ken knew from a previous visit who offered to show us the way North out of the town, he invited us for mint tea so we accepted his offer…. Little did we know where he was taking us for the tea though. His mate had a carpet shop and we were ushered into his sales room and given the hard sell while the tea was presented on a silver tray. The ‘salesman’ was most upset that he couldn’t tempt us with one of his rugs. Once we were shown the way out of the town we made our way up the Tiz n Test and headed for Marrakech.
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We arrived in Marrakech quite late and every hotel we tried was full, after trying 4 hotels we decided to head out of town towards our next days route down the Tiz n Tichka. After about ten miles we pulled over and set up camp to the sound of dogs, frogs and cars :D

Sunday 8th April

Another early start enabled us to head down the Tiz n Tichka and then hang a left onto the Teloulet loop.
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The scenery was breathtaking while driving this route
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There were other local guided tours using Land cruisers often coming our way and squeezing past was an interesting art. After rounding this bend we met two French guys driving Willis Jeeps.
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One was adamant that we drive past him where he was partly up on the embankment, he got out and was ‘guiding’ us through, there was a slight coming together of our vehicles and Lucy and I almost ended up going over the edge of a shear drop, I stopped to asses the situation but upon opening the drivers door realised that getting out wasn’t an option as we were literally on the edge. Lucy couldn’t get out as the passenger side was well and truly wedged up against the Jeep. Then without warning the French guy jumped in his Jeep and proceeded to make a very poor attempt at resolving the situation. He ended up denting two panels on the Patrol and smashing the n/s/r window. After a lot of shouting … he was called a lady's front bottom, a masturbator and told to go forth and multiply…. Lucy was amazed that I never twotted him. Apologies for no photos of the occasion but, Lu and I were both stuck in the Patrol until after the incident. A ‘road side’ repair was quickly put in place and we continued our journey.
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Camped at Dades valley in a RV park where another Frenchman complained that we were blocking his view.

Monday 9th April

After receiving txts from MMOB we decided to return to Marrakech instead of continuing up the Dades valley and across to the Todra Gorge.

Discovered that during the night the front offside tyre had mysteriously gone flat, could it of been the French twot who decided to seek his revenge for daring to spoil his view… who knows? Strangely enough both Lucy and I heard a pop and hiss during the night but thought it was one of the many tonic bottles that were on board.

The wheel was soon changed and once a hearty breakfast of bacon and beans was consumed we headed for Marrakech once again over the Tiz n Tichka pass.
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Kev advised us not to use the Hotel De Le Menara as “the rooms stank, the staff were rude, the bar was expensive and the breakfast was poor” so we found the Hotel Akabar which was a superb hotel and at £18.75 a night each we defiantly found a good one.
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The Patrol was safely parked behind locked gates due to the broken window.
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Once washed and changed we walked the short distance into the centre and main square. The sights, sounds and smells are almost impossible to capture in words, the place is so vibrant. We had been advised not to eat the street food and instead opted for a small restaurant on the edge of the square, Lu and Ken both had Lamb and prune tageenes whilst I opted for a chicken kebab served with good old chips.

We then spent an hour or so walking round the square looking at the stalls and venturing a short distance into the souks. The souks are a maze of small ‘streets’ and as it was now getting late we agreed to return the next day to explore them.
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Tuesday 10th April

After breakfast @ 9.00 am we set off about 10 am to the Palace Bahia where the Prime minister resided some time ago which has now been turned into a museum.
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The whole place is covered in tiny mosaic tiles.
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Each one would have been hand made when the Palace was built.
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We spent a couple of hours there looking round then set off back to the square to check out the souks. The next three hours were spent walking around the Souks getting totally disorientated, Lu did a bit of retail therapy.
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Virtually everything you can buy in the souks is made there, this young lad was knocking out metal spirals with such precision, it was amazing to see.
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New hat anyone? Take your pick.
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We walked back to the Hotel and spent 4 hours in the Hotel room relaxing and drinking Vodka. I received a phone call from Kev saying that the Land rover wouldn’t start due to the immobiliser and could we help. We have a recovery bar so said we would go to them tomorrow and tow them home or to Spain where they could get help from the RAC. We planned the route to near Arzou where the stricken Landy was stranded.

We met Ken at 7 pm and walked to the square where we sat and ate food off the market stalls.
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A feast or Lamb Tageene, Lamb and Cous Cous and Mixed Kebab with Olives and Tomato salad for starters with bread.
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After we went to a café for coffee and a wee, Ken had an ice cream with strawberry, vanilla and Chocolate and cream. A little girl came and begged for some of Kens Ice cream, he tried to give her some but she didn’t want the strawberry that was offered but when given chocolate she gladly took it, when he had finished she took the glass and scraped it clean. Within a split second of taking this photo her mum appeared and wanted ‘paying’
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While we were at the café to our surprise the Frenchman who nearly knocked us off the cliff and broke the Patrols window strolled up and started to walk into the exact same café we were in, when he saw us he was a bit dubious as to what our reaction was to be but I stood up and shook his hand then we all had a laugh about it. To put this scenario into perspective, it would be like someone from Germany having an accident with someone from Poland on a Welsh mountain road and then meeting them in a café in Trafalgar square two days later….. it’s a small world. We exchanged email address to send photos to each other and Lucy took a photo of Franck and I to capture the moment peace was made :D.
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We then went back into the Souk a little way to buy a few more gifts for those at home. Lucy also bought some Saffron and Incense off the Market Square.
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We then set off back to the Hotel with and I had this idea of using the hand held eTrex GPR to take us the shortest route, but it failed miserably due to the batteries failing and took us God knows where, (right turns) we must have walked miles and had to ask Taxi drivers and other locals for directions.

This should have been the front door of the Hotel Akabar :o :D
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Wednesday 11th April

Set off about 8:15 am after waiting for Ken to get his Laundry. Getting out of Marrakech was a little more challenging that getting in, it was about 09:00 by the time we had weaved our way out of the city.

How far would this guy get in the UK before getting pulled by the plod :eek: stacking that must be an art in itself :D
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The mobile farms were out in force today.
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At about 10.30 we received a phone call from Kev saying that after phone calls to Bill and help from others they eventually managed to get the Landy going.

We continued on to Chefchaouen were Kev and James had booked us into a hotel. We had to stop in Meknes about 4.15 for a MacDonald’s (it would be rude not to sample the local food :D)
Chefchaouen was a real pleasure to visit, the out door market stalls was like a mini Marrakech but the prices were cheaper.

Thursday 12th April

Our final day in Morocco saw us leaving the hotel about 09:00 and after a short run up to the boarder we soon arrived at the ferry port of Cueta.
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Our carriage soon arrived and we were soon aboard.
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Once disembarked we headed we headed for France and managed to get just North of Burgos shortly after 02:00 before catching some zzzz’s. 797 miles today which included the Moroccan border crossing, a 2 hour delay waiting for the boat to Spain + the 35 minute sea crossing.

Friday 13th April

Another 710 miles and we reached Abbeville in France where we stopped for the final night.

Saturday 14th April

The final 65 miles to the Tunnel was soon completed at we were on our way home.
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A superb two week adventure covering just under 5,000 miles with no breakdowns… not bad for a 16 year old 180,000 mile Patrol :clap :bow

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Excelllent stuff :)

Just as a matter of interest Paul, which twot advised you not to eat in the Djaar El Fnaar???

They've got such a fast turnover of food that its all fresh, and it's all cooked in front of you....I reckon it's probably much safer to eat there than in some of the restaurants (keep your eyes open when you're walking down the sidestreets and you'll see their meat hanging up in the alleys !)

PS Was the little man with a big hammer on this tour as well?? :augie
 
Great write up Paul.....:thumb

Love that photo with snow on the Mountains....Atlas I presume...?
 
Excellent. Brilliant photo's, great scenery and a great narrative. :clap
 
Only just found this thread Paul :blast

Fantastic :thumb2
 


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