Round 1: Eastern Europe

Smiltine

OK, OK, I know it's a ride report, but what about a little off-beat culture for you? I'd been invited for a wedding and had planned to link it in to the trip, forewarned that it would be an interesting affair. I say now that Latvians are superbly hospitable. They're informed Dave is here and therefore can't possibly not have him not come too. They help him with attire. So we're all off to a wedding.

It's a ceremony type doobie at the registry office and then off to a kind of an outdoor spa/camp place for the evening, staying over.

Non GS: Couple getting married. Jolly nice folks.

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The true adventure traveller prepares for every type of eventuality and occasion :D

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The wedding process is interesting here. As part of the ritual the bride and groom have to pass through seven bridges, which comprises of seven tests on their way to the reception where they negotiate various challenges. The first one is immediately after the reception. The Police arrive. There's some sort of problem, but they're charmed and presented with fruit and there are handshakes and good wishes. Policija depart with blues-and-two's. It's all total food for the eyes, very cool. Great wedding car, too. Couldn't work out what it was.

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It takes the Bride and Groom two hours to get to the reception with all of the various tests and whatever. But they roll up. Everyone is mellowed with beers and punch.
The Latvian capacity for celebration is stunning. We sit for dinner at 9.30. Toasts- Vokda, Brandy, Whiskey. Add beer. Then it is some dancing and stuff until 11. They do various things and award roles to various guests, fortunately of which we are spared, as I have no lingo aside from seeking jam of course. At midnight, everyone is outside for the traditional affairs, lots of stuff round the fire and traditional rituals and ceremonies. Fascinating, I confer with Dave, rather like Spock to Kirk.

At 1am it is back for some video of friends talking about the happy couple. Again despite no lingo everything is beautifully done. More spirits and toasts. eek. At 2am they sit for more food. Shortly after that more dancing. Cutting of the cake around 3am. I pull the rip-cord around that time, I have to ride tomorrow, or well, erm later today. Dave wisely retreats a little earlier. Evidently the events side of things run until about 6am.. now that's a late bar.

We get up at around 10. Many of the guests haven't been to bed and are casually sipping beer, singing traditional songs, jumping in the adjacent river, sunbathing, hopping in and out of the sauna. These people are epic. Don't dice with Latvians- they party.
 
Smiltine to Parnu

We have to head on to fit in the last of the Baltics so we are given a fond farewell from the wedding party, very sweet, and get driven back to the woodshed where the bikes are stowed. We load up and are bid farewell by great people. They love the bikes too.

The temperature is up in the 30's again- 31.5 according to the GS. We head to the coast to pick up the main road north to Ainazi and Parnu. As we motor to the coast the temp drops 10 degrees in 10km and it starts to rain. We think we get past it and are now heading North towards Estonia.

We hit the border; there's a great opportunity for a photo check. Here's me in 2007, and here's me now in the same spot. I just get younger, I don't know how I do it, really I don't.

Then..

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...And now

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We carry on towards Parnu, with the ready option of carrying on to Tallinn, another 2 hours or so down the road. As we apprach Parnu it rains again..

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And does it bloody well rain. I say it now, it is the worst rain I've ever rode in. The roads flood. My gear floods. In minutes we're totally soaked through.

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We limp in to Parnu and look for hotels- everything seems to have gone. Fortunately, I remember being here before and getting an apartment from a bar. I try there again on the offchance and bingo. Yeah!

Bizarrely on the other side of town they've had virtually no rain and twenty minutes later we're drinking ale outside. We drink plenty of the local brew 'A le Coq'. I like beer, and it is my favourite of the trip. We have Indian food which is pretty decent too. I write some of this in the bar after Dave bails. The pub- the 'Veeruv Olu' in Parnu. It's great, I'd recommend it. Say 'Hi' to Bo if you pass. Everyone is very pissed but pretty friendly. I had another unusual conversation with a hammered local who thought that if he just talked slower in Estonian I'd understand him.

In the 5 years since I've visited Parnu the place has become more run down. Sign of the times, a shame to see this vibrant historic little place going this way.

Last push North tomorrow.
 
Ah. Sorry about that :aidan

In fairness it has rained 5 days on this trip.



Did I say it had been over 30 degrees on 32 of the days though?


:hide
 
Okey dokey, here we go :thumb

Parnu to Tallinn

It's only a brief run up to Tallinn, so we'll be able to get a good look around the old town and watch the Wimbledon final somewhere over a cold one.
It was a simple run in with a stop at McDonalds to use the internet and book a hotel where Dave loses his key. Thankfully we find it on the floor inside. Excellent. So booking.com, the 'Tallink City Hotel', an ok rate, some secure parking, 5 minutes from the old town, Bob's your uncle.
Bikes parked up, changed and out for the afternoon air at a very respectable 1.30pm.
We amble in to the old town; it is Sunday and the Cruise Liner folk and other miscellaneous weekenders are in. The place is awash with check shorts and Canon cameras. It's a lovely place to amble about though, so we amble about. I can't remember where the amusing 'Kiek in de Kock' sign in is so we give up and head for a beer. You'll have to make do with 'Faget' and be happy.

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I've travelled to Tallinn many times before and like the place very much. At my last time here, in 2007, visiting my brother who lived here at the time, it was at the height of the British stag party visiting period. I'd kind of expected that this would have moved on, with our countryfolk having found other and cheaper places to ruin. I was wrong though, and in the bars with sports there were still plenty of groups of guys, and a rugby tour so we could be treated to a rendition of 'One big titty'.

We have some beers and nibbles with the local snack platter, some fierly jalapeno thingamybobs and Garlic Bread- not as you'd know it though, you should try it- it's like fried bread with more garlic than a very garlicy thing.
We're pounced upon by some bloke from Bristol who is here for two weeks and has ended up on his own. He really wants to chat and I really want to watch the tennis. Fortunately some mouthy obnoxious Australian who very much reminds me of 'Frank Donger' from the Paul Hogan show decides to engage him, so that's a relief.

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Donger is a proper dick, but he's bitten off more than he can chew, as Bristol has him locked in his boring tractor beam; Donger can't wriggle out of it. It becomes better than the tennis even though Federer has broken Murray's early break back and they're having a quality game. 'I've gotta gow an' talk to me wife' slurs Donger, but Bristol keeps on with the onslaught. At the end of the first set we go somewhere else as Donger is close to breaking away, and I can't be doing with any more of it.
Tallinn has a way of attracting some very, very, odd people.

Back to the hotel with best intentions for a late walk and beer, but the many miles, pot holes, wedding and 38 days of consecutive drinking have put paid to that.

Tomorrow we head South. Back to Latvia, for the long crossing from Ventspils to Travemunde in Germany. Sigh :(
 
Tallinn to Ventspils

It's a relatively long ride today and given the ferry timings we have all day to do it, so we take advantage of the noon checkout.
On day 39 I decide to sort my tank bag. Curious but not unexpected. Lots of crap; mentos, stickers, greek receipts, bottle openers, hand on a stick, opened Aloe Vera, cables I forgot I bought and enough coins to melt down and make a small car.

With still time in hand I take another walk out to the old town in the morning Sunshine. Dave has asked him to get him a souvenir of Estonia, so I buy him some 'Colonel Gadaffi' branded matches.

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Hotel sorted, overnight bag put together for the ferry and we're off. Getting out of Tallinn is easy which is good news. I wasn't particularly looking forward to the run to Ventspils though- mostly straight for the run until Riga, and then an orbital navigation to pick up the main road out to our destination and the Scandlines ferry. However, it was a great ride and I guess you never can tell.

We head back to Parnu beach for Pizza at the famous Steffani's. En route we see plenty of bikers now, which we haven't seen for some time. We stop at Statoil, where a biker chap on a V-Max tells us to watch out as there's a Police speed trap 5km down the road. Good work, fella.

I get some export beer that will be exported.

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Back to Parnu beach and Pizza. There's a queue, but it is worth a wait. Point of note, the Estonians won't queue properly, and the waitresses won't seat you. Keep your eyes out and get a table. Having been gazumped we almost have to physically seat a group of 4 non-Estonians in front of us who don't get it, our British sense of fair play preventing us from just walking past them. Well done us. I swear, if we didn't make it perfectly clear they'd still be there now. It's no reflection on the service though, or the pizzas, which incidentally are something else. We're sitting on a great terrace in the sunshine, by the beach, served by a lovely young lass who is full of good manners and smiles. We have some funny pizza with pickled onions, coffees and humungous ice cream sundaes.

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We linger for a while, under no pressure, very relaxed and chilled. Locals come by and examine the bikes, pointing here and there. There are sure worse places to be on a Sunday afternoon.

The pizza is huge, so I get a take away box which conveniently fits on the bike.

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Back to the road and towards the Latvian border again. The weather is beautiful, blue skies and 25 degrees. Just right, and we're whizzing along in the pine trees.
We see an Estonian Police bike coming the other way. We wave, he waves back and gives us a flash of Blue lights and a woop of the siren. Cool. By golly, I think he likes bikes, don’t you know.

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We cross into Latvia. Going is still good, but all of a sudden we see plenty of Policija on the main road to Riga.

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We catch and follow a police Volvo cruiser for about 10k or so. We sit wisely and patiently behind. Eventually he spies someone tanking it the other way and does a quick u-turn, off in pursuit.
As we approach Riga we get a sequence of supremely fun and interesting biking. A deer crosses in front of us ahead, just by a 'Deer' sign. A man wanders across the road with two dogs behind freely roaming, where the traffic is fast. He's not interested in if his dogs make it.
On we go; there's a man in the middle of the road, a cyclist who has stopped trying to retrieve a lorry wheel. I slow the traffic to a halt with my hazards being sure to take plenty time to do it. He looks mighty relieved. I toot the horn and give him a big thumbs up. He waves back and returns the thumb.

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A beligerant pedestrian walks straight out on a crossing over a dual carriageway where all the traffic must be at 60-70. Lots of brake lights.
We're cut up by Uncle Albert in a Land Rover Freelander.

It rains and there's a pretty rainbow. Ahhhhh.

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We round Riga and on to the road to the coast. It rains, and the road surface is now poor, repaired and rutted with two tyre-track rivers.

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We get to the new surface, it stops raining, we get gravel again. But then there's a relieving 'Euro Project' sign and the road becomes grand. It is a great run, we push on at 70-80 and the going is interesting with ups and downs and turns but all fast and flowing. There's little traffic.

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It becomes a lovely evening and we trundle in to Ventspils at around 10.30pm. It is still very light. Ventspils is vey charming for a port town and much changed since my last visit- but very closed. With the light so good it slips our minds that it is so late. Even the nearest 'Hesburger' according to Garmin is 117km North, so it is back to the Petrol Station for some late night snacks.
'No alcohol' says the petrol station lady; we're outside licensing hours. Bother :mad: It isn't just us then.
I hope the bar is open on the boat, I'm bloody gasping.

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Ventspils to Travemunde

We board the Scandlines ferry 'Watling Street' just after midnight. It's a very easy boarding, straight on, and we're 2 of only 3 bikes, the third one belonging to a Dutch Bernard Bresslaw-a-like who does the exact opposite of what the crew are telling him to do, which makes for an eventful start. He's clearly lost without his Dutch equivalent Sid James for guidance. The klopek eventually drops and he eventually puts the bike in the right place. The ferry fella is very clued up and ties his bike properly rather than his someone-you-dislike-Christmas-present wrapping exercise, and it is over to us. I use the pizza box with a jacket over it and it's a one tie effort over the seat. We're sorted in just a few minutes.
We have a cabin for the crossing and it is more than adequate with plenty of space.

The ferry is fine but no QE2 that's for sure, so I won't be needing my evening attire, that's a relief.
99% of the punters are lorry drivers.
Departure is at 4am, but the bar is open until 3, which is splendid news, so we head for a few cool ones to make us sleep easy. Beer isn't expensive and it's the Latvian 'Cesu' which quaffs very easily. We're treated to loud drivel Europop and the noises of Russian Reality TV from the adjacent pullman seats, so hardly an ambience and clearly designed to make you clear off ASAP. It sets the industrial tone of the crossing. Sleeping people in the bar area are rattled and told not to by a bald headed Scandlines branded knuckle dragger. We're spent and off to bed.

The following is a day at sea. Breakfast is a buffet, in an avalanche of pancake grabbing truckers. They obviously know the score, lugging as many plates of food as possible.

Most of the day is spent predictably resting. I left my book on the bike, so watch most of the first series of 'Auf Weidersehen Pet' on the laptop between naps. We manage to miss dinner which finishes at 7.30, plus you lose an hour if you haven't got your wits about as we cross to CET. We've already pre-paid, so we speak to the phenomenally unhelpful Edita, a po-faced crone who is just about as rude as you could wish for, before Henry the purser reasonably dives in and says that we can have sandwiches and coffee, which is actually just as well as I couldn't have put up with another Truck Driver Selfridges Sale.

One of the things we've found noticed is the resurgence of jean shorts among the community of Eastern European young ladies. Kind of hard not to, actually. On the ferry though we've found a tubby truck driver, who kind of has the textbook UKGSer profile, who is following the same fashion and a good look it is not.
Wherever we are in the 27 hour crossing, in the bar at 2am, at breakfast, the following evening in the café bar there he is, he wanders past in the same get up. Not enticing.

Ah, there he is again. It is completely ruining my pleasant images. I may need counselling.

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I sit up late and journal the last few days. The bar closes at 10pm. Wise idea that, as there's a few hammered lorry pilots about.
Another sleep and we're back to German roads.
 
Travemunde to Arnhem

Early to rise; we're up before the alarm with the prospect of an early roll-off from the ferry. Getting off is a breeze, as we arrive on at the bikes they're already being untied and the coast is clear to go. As we're kitting up, Henry the purser appears genially. Again, sorry that there's been a misunderstanding he brings us two goody bags as a gesture of good faith. Great. Fruit, drinks, cookie, even a natty pen and a LED torch. Nice one, how good is that. Thumbs up for Henry at Scandlines, top man. Mental note to e-mail complimentary comments :thumb2

We roll out from the docks and in typical German efficient style we're on an Autobahn in five minutes, chewing up the miles, and mingling with the Hamburg rush hour traffic. It's uneventful and we stick with the A1 past Bremen, where we peel off and head via the town of Cloppenburg. German motoring is quiet and reliable, with everyone doing the expected, which you won't appreciate just how a refreshing thing it is after some shady efforts in the past weeks. We take a fairly direct scenic route towards Holland, stopping at a town called Haselunne for Goulash Soup, which is a bit naff sadly (the soup that is, not the town) although the garlic butter on the acompanying bread is rather good, and the welcome was nice. It kindly pours of rain whilst we stop, and then brightens up as we head out. Lovely.
Germany is the first country in 23 where we have to pay for Wi-fi access. So I do, and get to good old booking.com. Now where shall we go? Somewhere mid-Travemunde and Calais. How about Arnhem. So I get a hotel sorted in Arnhem.

Dave says he's looking forward to Belgian beer tonight at which point I tell him we're going to Holland :D

And so to said Holland and country no. 24. I'd never noticed a Holland road/speed limit sign on the borders. It has windmills on the building landscape thingy. Nice touch. I take another snap. Another lucky gonk that's served me well, but good grief I'm carrying so much tat :)

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To Arnhem, where we visit the bridge famous from WWII and setting for 'A bridge to far' and visit the Airborne memorial where some young Dutch troops are relaxing.

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[an SS officer is approaching under a white flag]
Major Harry Carlyle: Rather interesting development, sir.
[to the German] Major Harry Carlyle: That's far enough! We can hear you from there!
SS Panzer Officer: My general says there is no point in continuing this fighting! He wishes to discuss terms of a surrender!
Major Harry Carlyle: Shall I answer him, sir?
Lt. Col. John Frost: Tell him to go to hell.
Major Harry Carlyle: We haven't the proper facilities to take you all prisoner! Sorry!
SS Panzer Officer: [confused] What?
Major Harry Carlyle: We'd like to, but we can't accept your surrender! Was there anything else?
[German officer walks off]
Lt. Col. John Frost: Well, that's that.


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Not quite so chipper in 1945 :(

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eek.

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We stay at a very nice hotel, in fact one of the nicest I've stayed in for some time- at the 'Landgoed Groot Warnsborn'. I manage to break off the front cover of the ignition whist jockeying the bike about with the big wooden room key flopping around. Bother. Find the plastic bit in the gravel and then employ much electrical and duct tape for that professional repair.

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Back to the hotel and a very pleasant welcome and a fabulous room. Down for dinner. I figure I might as well spoil myself as it'll only be another hundred miles on the million I'll already have to do at the gym to get rid of my holiday lard.

A starter of 'Old Sausage and Cheese'…

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(Sorry, I'd eaten most of the cheese before I got the camera out).

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.. Some very nice bread and paste affair…

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.. And quite superb beef.

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.. Complimented with a couple of very pleasant glasses of Cabernet Sauvignon.

Ho hum. Time for bed, with the promise of a return to a soggy UK tomorrow :(
 
Quote "I'm carrying so much tat"

When you unpack.. give us an idea of how much you took that you didn't need/ never used/ wish you hadn't taken/ wish you had taken etc. etc.

It's a pity the reports have to stop, but it'll be good to have you home again, older, but wiser :thumb
 
Arnhem to Romford ...erm, doesn't sound quite so exotic now, does it :(

Yes folks, that's Romford, Merry old England. One town name you certainly won't have to (or want to, for that matter) look up in google maps.

It's all going home stuff, I'm afraid. The most direct and quick route to the tunnel concluded upon, following a first rate breakfast.

We leave and head on to the Dutch Motorway. Holland. Windmills, clogs, mice, tulips, excessive use of the letter 'O', etc.

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I've all but exhausted my music collection over the past weeks, so I decide to listen to the first serious album I ever bought, Talk Talk's 'Natural History'. It's serious music, and we hit serious rain so this is how I experience it. Memorable.

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We cross in to Belgium. Crappy, dirty, filthy laybys, Tailgaters, dodgers and weavers and generally crappy feckless driving. Oh, and Ten bob to use the WC.
The Antwerp Ring. A royal pain in the bleedin' ring more like.

And then to France. Nearly there. It's brightened up; a customary blustery run along the E40 towards the Tunnel Sous La Manche. Top tip: If you need your washing drying lickety split pop it up along the road there.

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I lose Dave on the road to Calais somewhere following a petrol stop and phone problems (thanks o2) leave us out of comms, so we get separate Eurotunnel trains and make our respective ways back to HQ's.

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It is raining in the UK. From what I gather that is not a surprise to anyone who has been on our little island for the past weeks. I float back to the M25 and filter through the jams , barging through to the busy Dartford tunnel on my two-wheeled caravan.

Home again, home again, Jiggety-Jog, then.

Here endeth Round 1- 6,623 miles to the better.

But hey, it's just a pit stop. I'll be back out shortly, so stay tuned :D

:beerjug:
 
The worst part of any Tour...

Sadly, yes :(

Yeah, but what are we going to do without Rob's fantastic ride reports when he gets back?:tears

get the uk border guards to send him packing if he tries to get back in :D:D:D:D

has been good this:beerjug:

Thanks kindly gents.. glad you enjoyed! :thumb2

I'm hoping this is the first of many?

Certainly is old bean.. just going to regroup and work out what and where next..

Quote "I'm carrying so much tat"

When you unpack.. give us an idea of how much you took that you didn't need/ never used/ wish you hadn't taken/ wish you had taken etc. etc.

It's a pity the reports have to stop, but it'll be good to have you home again, older, but wiser :thumb

Cheers bud :thumb

Yep, I will do a bit on my thoughts..

:beerjug:
 
I've just returned from a couple of days in Wunderbar Deutschland, got lots of catching up to do, emails, voicemails, trips'n tours to sort, collected Molly the dawg, she wants walkies ...

... but the only catching up I've been doing for the last hour Rob is with you :thumb

Thanks ;)

:beerjug:
 


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