Here’s the sorry tale: I bought this magnificent blue beast brand new in May 2024, full of grand plans — the Alps, the Pyrenees, at the very least a heroic ride to the good bakery two towns over. Then I went and snapped my Achilles heel like a cheap elastic band, and spent the next year doing my best impression of a pirate with a limp. The bike just sat in the garage, gleaming, judging me, occasionally weeping a single tear of unleaded.
So it’s covered fewer miles than a gym membership bought in January. It is, to all intents and purposes, brand new — just with a tragic backstory.
The extras, because I clearly had big ambitions:
• Spotlights — turn night into day, terrify local wildlife
• Heated seats — toast your rear like a fine crumpet
• Heated grips — no more hands like frozen fish fingers
• Crash bars — never tested, and let’s keep it that way
• Pannier rack and top box — room for tent, snacks, and delusions of grandeur
This bike deserves an owner with two functioning ankles and a taste for adventure. I have neither the ankle nor, frankly, the willpower to keep looking at it.
Serious buyers only. My Achilles has healed; my heart has not.
£15,995
So it’s covered fewer miles than a gym membership bought in January. It is, to all intents and purposes, brand new — just with a tragic backstory.
The extras, because I clearly had big ambitions:
• Spotlights — turn night into day, terrify local wildlife
• Heated seats — toast your rear like a fine crumpet
• Heated grips — no more hands like frozen fish fingers
• Crash bars — never tested, and let’s keep it that way
• Pannier rack and top box — room for tent, snacks, and delusions of grandeur
This bike deserves an owner with two functioning ankles and a taste for adventure. I have neither the ankle nor, frankly, the willpower to keep looking at it.
Serious buyers only. My Achilles has healed; my heart has not.
£15,995
