I may be wrong, but it looks like item 1
https://www.realoem.com/bmw/enUS/sh...9-K84-BMW-F_900_XR_0K21,_0K23_&diagId=61_2485
All, of the plugs are available as repair items for this purpose
It sound like the dealer is being a bit officious and jobsworth
Even if they had to purchase a new loom, there would be no way that they would strip the bike,
they would just swap the connector over.
Looking at the loom, the isn't a connector for a replacement loom to join to, it's a whole new loom
and who in there right mind is going to pay for a strip & rebuild of a bike to replace a harness due to a broken connector
something isn't right there.
Any have decent auto electrical bod could de & re pin the connector in about 20 minutes