… what defence kit do I need to bring with me? It is dodgy and full of rough folks oop there. I’ve read it here…
… what defence kit do I need to bring with me? It is dodgy and full of rough folks oop there. I’ve read it here…
AirPods Pro already in the pocket! Will double up as a festival on the move for my ears.ear plugs to block out the moaning
TA for the heads up loveI would encourage you to talk to the local population. Dont be alarmed if they smile at you , its not a preamble to a mugging. Dont be surprised if people ask if “ are you alright?”. You may even be adressed as love, but dont get too excited. You will still be riding on the left, but Northerners are more courteous, so please avoid cutting folk up at roundabouts, if someone flashes you its not an act of annoyance.
Lastly avoid the temptation to overfill your tank at petrol stations selling E10 at £1.29, carrying extra “ cheap fuel” in old vinegar containers is frowned on by the plod.

Duly noted. TAWhich part of the North West? If Lancashire you'll need to buy some wooden clogs to enable you to navigate the narrow cobbled streets that are full of Whippet poo, you'll need a flat cap to protect you from the droppings of all the racing pigeons flying about. Take some Gaviscon because you may develop a bad case of indigestion from all the black pudding you'll eat, but the decent ale should help with that.
If going to Liverpool, do not wear a Man Utd shirt, make sure you have locking wheel nuts for your car, better still hire or borrow a Rottweiler to leave in it. Don't be seen carrying or reading a copy of the Sun as there's still lynch mobs roaming the streets. If you need the cops they are referred to as the Bizzies, you'd best make sure you have good access to Google Translate for anywhere north of the Mersey. Best give Thatto Heath Labour club a miss, Stu is in Benidorm so you won't see his Friday evening Caberet act, however there may be a Bachelors tribute act instead.
Hope this helps, have a great time![]()
Wrong side! …..Tha noz
TD
“Peoples Republic of Yorkshire”
Have you seen the news lately Brian? Not sure my nasal passages will be able to cope, so I shall take a wide detour? TACareful as you pass Birmingham.
Have a good trip Ev
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If you’re stopping a fair distance before you reach Liverpool you’re not going to the north west. You’re going to the West Midlands.Duly noted. TA
- Flat cap packed
- Must buy clogs
- No need for gaviscon, as black pudding is wasted on me.
- Liverpool you say, heading in that direction but will stop short by a fair distance. Phew.
- Modern man me, flicking pages of a daily paper is so last century, I prefer scrolling want my elongated thumb
- DeepL is my preferred translator app, Saing that, not sure any app will ever be able to understand Scouse.
Don’t wear your Rolex. It’s the GDP of some of the cities up North.
Forecast looking very good,It rains
How did you know?Oh correction. You say Cheshire, you’re meeting your WAG.
He needs Google translate for Laaaahdun let alone Oooop northGoogle Translate for anywhere north of the Mersey.