Weaponised GSA

[Warlord]

Dear someone who thinks slashing their own tyres is a good plan...
Next time you are about to fit new tyres, could you please get a gang of tooled up herberts to surprise you at the lights, push you off your bike and (at the very least) stand in the way while you get yourself up off the ground, find your tyre slashing implement and slash your tyres before your bike is out of range. Once you've done that, perhaps you could let the rest of us know how well it worked.
Frankly, I'd be surprised if slashing your tyres whilst alone in your garage with access to your toolbox was a particularly quick and easy task.

Ok. I'll do just that.

Video to follow..

 

[Warlord]

What I'm more interested in is..

A) How easy is it to puncture a rear tyre, at its thickest part of tread? Very easy or very difficult?

B) With one puncture hole (not slashed), how long will it take to go flat. Starting at 42 PSI.

Because that's how much time they'll get riding time. Or that's how much time you need to stall the event before they take off.

Will a solid spike be more efficient, or a hollow spike (like a veterinary needle) left in the puncture be more efficient at fast air loss.

 

[Warlord]

Once we see if its a viable option, then we solve the puzzle of how easy and quickly it can be deployed.

My rear tyre needs replacing right now so its gonna get stabbed very shortly once my chosen implement arrives.

Never willingly punctured a tyre before so no idea how easy it'll be?

Then we'll figure out how quickly and easily it can be done.

If it all fails and is just impracticable then that's that.

 

[Davey B]

You really are bonkers. What a ludicrous thread. (great comedy value tho)

 

[Warlord]

You really are bonkers. What a ludicrous thread. (great comedy value tho)

Cheers

 

[Sea Dog]

Once we see if its a viable option, then we solve the puzzle of how easy and quickly it can be deployed.

My rear tyre needs replacing right now so its gonna get stabbed very shortly once my chosen implement arrives.

Never willingly punctured a tyre before so no idea how easy it'll be?

Then we'll figure out how quickly and easily it can be done.

If it all fails and is just impracticable then that's that.

Well, can't say fairer than that! Good on yer!

 

[snelly]

You could always go to halfords, get a valve core tool; when approached jump off, remove the valve core; but don't put the dust cap on; they would be well fucked.

 

[leadfarmer]

You could keep a distress flare Velcro'd in the cockpit

If you get attacked just flip the fuel cap up and shove the distress flare in there, that'll stop them riding it away and won't damage your tires

If you've got keyless it's a bonus

 

[Deleted account 200417001]

Or a smoke grenade / flash bang distraction device

 

[Warlord]

Or a smoke grenade / flash bang distraction device

Yeah, thats called a 1987 Enfield

 

[Warlord]

You could keep a distress flare Velcro'd in the cockpit

If you get attacked just flip the fuel cap up and shove the distress flare in there, that'll stop them riding it away and won't damage your tires

See, now you're heading in the right direction. Just turn down the burnt crotch and explosive nature of the plan a little bit.

 

[Troppo]

FOR FUCK’S SAKE, MAKE IT STOP.

 

[jefformston]

I think your comment should read "you are unlikely to be prosecuted" as I'd think that you would be arrested on suspicion of assault/offensive weapon etc and the police would let the CPS or a more senior officer make the decision once back at the police station. The end result is major inconvenience to the have-a-go-hero

On a practical note, I was stationary at roundabout waiting for a gap in the traffic when some west end of Newcastle flat faced mouth breathers ran up and simply pushed me. My GSA over balanced before I could stop it and I was unable to do anything other than lower it to the ground. What their intentions were isn't too clear (although I'll bet nicking the bike featured in their tiny minds). They were deterred by my make who circled the roundabout and charged over the footpath toward them.

My point is that despite all the bluster about defending yourself or fighting them off, it happens so quickly that you're at a great disadvantage.

Heard of a similar incident near McD's at West Denton, it's either the same incident or it's getting to be a common practice.

 

[stolzy]

Grown men fantasising about wreaking terrible revenge on teenagers on scooters.

There's not been such an amusing thread on here in ages.

 

[Warlord]

Grown men fantasising about wreaking terrible revenge on teenagers on scooters.

There's not been such an amusing thread on here in ages.

We aim to please

A smile is always a good start to a Monday morning.

 

[Neil W]

Now if you carry any item that can be classed as an offensive weapon and use it to protect your motorcycle from theft it will be you who ends up in the sh*t, however, if for safety reasons you were to fit a small CO2 (or even a powder) fire extinguisher on a bracket on the pannier rail where it is easily accessible !

Even a short blast from a CO2 extinguisher in the face will literally take the breath away of anyone with no permanent side affects (even if they are wearing a crash helmet) , they are then totally disorientated and if you still 'feel that you are in fear of your life' because your attacker is armed you can always tw*t them in a non lethal area with the red metal cudgel you happen to have in your hand .

The powder extinguishers are just as good but are messy and do leave a lot of physical evidence after you blast someone in the face with one.

Trust me both types do work extremely well against naughty people and very large nasty scrapyard guard dogs !!!!!

 

[Blackal]

Why fuck about? Attach a webbing strap to the extinguisher, and just bust him in the chops with it.

 

[Warlord]

Now if you carry any item that can be classed as an offensive weapon and use it to protect your motorcycle from theft it will be you who ends up in the sh*t, however, if for safety reasons you were to fit a small CO2 (or even a powder) fire extinguisher on a bracket on the pannier rail where it is easily accessible !

Even a short blast from a CO2 extinguisher in the face will literally take the breath away of anyone with no permanent side affects (even if they are wearing a crash helmet) , they are then totally disorientated and if you still 'feel that you are in fear of your life' because your attacker is armed you can always tw*t them in a non lethal area with the red metal cudgel you happen to have in your hand .

The powder extinguishers are just as good but are messy and do leave a lot of physical evidence after you blast someone in the face with one.

Trust me both types do work extremely well against naughty people and very large nasty scrapyard guard dogs !!!!!

Thats a good idea. I like that, and it has a genuine benefit on the bike.

See I knew someone had the answer. Only downside is that it can also be used against you.

This is potentially how much time you've got, so you better have a plan.

Personally in this scenario I would have tucked my elbows and knees in and opened the throttle !!

Good luck everybody

<iframe width="560" height="315" src="https://www.youtube.com/embed/xi5yMPU_VpA" frameborder="0" allowfullscreen></iframe>

 

[snelly]

Yeah, thats called a 1987 Enfield

I would prefer to use a ; Lee Enfield on them.

 

[snelly]

You could always carry an anchor in the top box ; when Laddo jumps on flip the box lid open , and chuck the anchor out as he rides away. Excellent comedy value.