AF-XIED for R1200 LC

I once had a flat spot but some cream took care of it.

:tumbleweed
 
It was invisible cream so no-one else knew it was there ;)
 
Can you tell me where I can get some of that cream, my 1200 LC has a very noticeable flat spot from about 3500 to 5000rpm. Dealer even fitted new headers in case the flappy valve was causing it - it made no difference 😞
 
I could sell you some cream. It comes in a nice pink box, otherwise you wouldn't know it was there. Simply cable tie the pink box to your crash-bars, so you know it's there, and apply sparingly to the affected flat spot. No other pink box with cream in it does what this stuff does. You can even use it on your face if you take your helmet off in sunny weather and no-one would know. It's a snap really at £350 per 100ml little pink box. You'll be impressed with just how much smoother your face feels, compared with not using it.:jibberbig
 
Bob Jeffries said:
Can you tell me where I can get some of that cream, my 1200 LC has a very noticeable flat spot from about 3500 to 5000rpm. Dealer even fitted new headers in case the flappy valve was causing it - it made no difference ��
Click to expand...

Sorry Bob apparently that cream called just an illusion is out of stock permanently, but help is nearby, apparently a real doctor with real real engineering skills has made a cure for this terrible sickness, see below.

https://www.beemerboneyard.com/bmwafxied1200lc.html
 
I'm waiting eagerly for you to try that new cream Bob.

I've made an appointment with my doctor and hope to convince her that prescribing me the new cream will make both our lives so much more fulfilled, and less flat!

If all goes well for you, as I'm sure will be the case with this new cream, I hope to get my prescription and join you in the flat spotless world.
 
Bob Jeffries said:
I'm waiting eagerly for you to try that new cream Bob.

I've made an appointment with my doctor and hope to convince her that prescribing me the new cream will make both our lives so much more fulfilled, and less flat!

If all goes well for you, as I'm sure will be the case with this new cream, I hope to get my prescription and join you in the flat spotless world.
Click to expand...

My cream is on its way, but do not count on my expertise, I just know this proven cream works, it has been shown technically by experts like Roger 04 T and Knutk, that is plenty for me.............:D
 
Smogbob said:
My cream is on its way, but do not count on my expertise, I just know this proven cream works, it has been shown technically by experts like Roger 04 T and Knutk, that is plenty for me.............:D
Click to expand...

Don't forget in order for it to work properly, after an initial application you have to wait 5 hours whilst standing on one leg with your left finger in your right ear. You then (within 30 seconds of 5 hours being up) have to do three pirouettes whilst humming the ride of the valkyries. You can then complete the application and you definitely won't have any flat spots left. If you don't like it, you can get your money back...all you have to do is return all of the "Illusion" including that you've already used, repacked into the patented pink box, and remember to remove the Illusion sticker from your Emu.
 
Morety said:
Don't forget in order for it to work properly, after an initial application you have to wait 5 hours whilst standing on one leg with your left finger in your right ear. You then (within 30 seconds of 5 hours being up) have to do three pirouettes whilst humming the ride of the valkyries. You can then complete the application and you definitely won't have any flat spots left. If you don't like it, you can get your money back...all you have to do is return all of the "Illusion" including that you've already used, repacked into the patented pink box, and remember to remove the Illusion sticker from your Emu.
Click to expand...

New instructions on this cream, plug into bike, leave at number 7, lucky number ;) full tank of fuel, and give it the beans on German Autobahn, repeat a few times, and then look in mirror for the smile............:hippy
 
New in....with every order of cream, you will receive a free 5 litre container of nitromethane. Simply mix in with your petrol tank contents, plug in the pink box via the cotton thread link provided to your ecu wires (a granny knot around the obd cable will do), sing the last two verses of "paint your wagon", disconnect and off you go. Your seat of the pants dyno should kick in a few seconds after starting the bike up. You won't have to engage any gears before being launched into orbit.
 
Mr Bean said:
Have you ridden one?

It may show on a rolling road, not that I can feel in real time riding.

It is as smooth as a very smooth thing :D
Click to expand...

Yes I have one and yes it is. Mine has been HT’ed (no comments please) and also has an Arrow/Gianelli exhaust. It has been on the Dyno and mine never actually dips there - has a few more lb-ft but a couple less peak horses than that graph. If there is anything to be done to remove built in “restrictions” I will take it.

My T595 gained 22hp at 5,000 just by putting on the Triumph Sport Pipe and Tune. No where near as bad nowadays.
 
Belco100 said:
Yes I have one and yes it is. Mine has been HT’ed (no comments please) and also has an Arrow/Gianelli exhaust. It has been on the Dyno and mine never actually dips there - has a few more lb-ft but a couple less peak horses than that graph. If there is anything to be done to remove built in “restrictions” I will take it.

My T595 gained 22hp at 5,000 just by putting on the Triumph Sport Pipe and Tune. No where near as bad nowadays.
Click to expand...

Seems not much out there at the moment for the 1250, even AF-XIED are not available, but the cream is always available.
 
Morety said:
New in....with every order of cream, you will receive a free 5 litre container of nitromethane. Simply mix in with your petrol tank contents, plug in the pink box via the cotton thread link provided to your ecu wires (a granny knot around the obd cable will do), sing the last two verses of "paint your wagon", disconnect and off you go. Your seat of the pants dyno should kick in a few seconds after starting the bike up. You won't have to engage any gears before being launched into orbit.
Click to expand...

In breaking news, it seems that rival cream manufacturers have established that the invisible cream bought from 3rd parties using their pink jars has no way of touching your skin, so it is entirely a placebo. Its all on FaceCream.
 
papasquelch said:
In breaking news, it seems that rival cream manufacturers have established that the invisible cream bought from 3rd parties using their pink jars has no way of touching your skin, so it is entirely a placebo. Its all on FaceCream.
Click to expand...

Wonder if Nivea will take them to court for using their idea............:blast
 
papasquelch said:
In breaking news, it seems that rival cream manufacturers have established that the invisible cream bought from 3rd parties using their pink jars has no way of touching your skin, so it is entirely a placebo. Its all on FaceCream.
Click to expand...

Ah, that's because some rivals are using jars and not small rectangular pink boxes which need (for RFI reasons) to be placed under the seat and close to the emu. Try sticking a jar under the seat and obviously that won't work. Ours are the only boxes that the emu can read because the label faces it whilst still allowing you to dispense a dollop when needed. Users who claim that it has no way of touching the skin are obviously misusing it or their emus are taking it all, proving that it does in fact work. Lovely plumage, the 1200GS emu. It's just resting you know, it's not inactive. Best colour scheme is the Norwegian Blue. Lovely that one..most popular by far on the arctic circle loop rides. The way the bike dives and twists its way through the fjords is a thing to behold. Emus not flashed with our illusion cream often pine for the fjords you know...
 
Hoping my 2 jars that are in German customs will fly down the autobahn next week, so I can rub them on my delicate rear end...........:D
 
Nippy Normans supply Touratech, Wunderlich, Desert Fox and many other makes of accessories.
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