Serious design and security fault

[hibee]

That's ok then......will it be called Duckhams Suitable For Your BMW so i'll recognise it? Otherwise I might be well confused with all those numbers and letter confirurations!

Incidentally............I have been using Sainsbury's extra virgin olive oil with a little lemon juice and some finely chopped garlic in my final drive for a number of years now...................far more economical than the expensive stuff that the nice people at the BMW garage try to sell me.....!



David

 

['Nuffsaid]

What is wrong with you lot?

You lot overcomplicate things with farkles, bricks, oil etc .... Simple idea

LEAVE THE REAR WHEEL AT HOME

Hope that helps

 

[Wapping]

What is wrong with you lot?

You lot overcomplicate things with farkles, bricks, oil etc .... Simple idea

LEAVE THE REAR WHEEL AT HOME

Hope that helps

Someone will steal my wheel from home, when I am off on my motorcycle.

You have not thought this through at all.

Very unhelpful.

 

[Packer]

The definitive answer to this age old problem is to order from Tescos online for home delivery and ride your bike instead of parking at Tescos.

The staff at home can receive the goods in your absence and will prepare the food for your return.

If you are worried about the wheels being stolen at home then rent a mini excavator to prepare a suitable trench in the garage, it need only be 200mm deep.

Park the bike in the trench and then fill the trench to floor level with quick setting concrete. Be sure to wait for it to set fully prior to going indoors to eat as failure to do so may impair the security of this system.

A bonus to this technique is that you can leave the panniers full of frog bricks at home whilst riding.

 

[Wapping]

Well, whenever I'm staying in strange places or Wales .....

David Hail, I am looking at a picture of england but cannot find anywhere called wales. Do you mean Wells?

 

['Nuffsaid]

Someone will steal my wheel from home, when I am off on my motorcycle.

You have not thought this through at all.

Very unhelpful.

Do i have to spell the obvious out .....?

YOU CEMENT YOUR WHEEL INTO THE GARAGE FLOOR

et voila monsieur !

 

[Wapping]

Do i have to spell the obvious out .....?

YOU CEMENT YOUR WHEEL INTO THE GARAGE FLOOR

et voila monsieur !

Cement. Is that like concrete?

 

[DanielM]

Up coming trip

Dear Wapping, make sure you take a suitable tactical hunting knife with you, make sure that it has blood channels included in the design (I think I saw one for sale from a fellow Wanchor), he seemed to have a lot of encouragement regarding this. This may prove useful for removing those special star thingies on the wheel, but I feel would be better used on the oiks who would take the wheel in the first place.

Also, I was worried about the angle of the bike whilst on the side stand, but after searching on this site that the engine is very lean (although my bike leans aswell - is it broken?), and someone recommended getting a power captain to assist with the lean, however, I haven't noticed any decrease in the angle. Someone else suggested getting a different map, and I thought of you, so I got one of Wales. I can let you have a look if you like.

 

['Nuffsaid]

Cement. Is that like concrete?

Hang on ... I will start a "What Concrete"? thread and get back to you - remind me - it was for a 1200GS wasn't it - what year and colour?

 

[LBL]

now then

Cement. Is that like concrete?

I do believe we have someone perfectly qualified to answer this construction question.

NCPierce over to you.

 

[chad]

I do believe we have someone perfectly qualified to answer this construction question.

NCPierce over to you.

now depending on the bike you need to used the right concrete.

if we are talking about the 1200 then C35 will suffice.

1200ADV then you will have to go stronger and use a C40

how ever if you have the heavyweight 1150GSA then you will

deffo have to use C50 with some Rienforcement to hold it up, hope this answers the question

ive heard that BMW have seen this thread , and are now pioneering a new stabilising system, that incorporates twin airbags that at a flick of a switch on the bars inflate either side of the rear wheel to hold the bike upright and hide the rear wheel nuts

this will only add another 52kgs to the bike

 

[fatcatdude67]

I have been looking at my 1200 and am very worried.

I have just noticed that when the motorcycle is parked up on its centre stand (that is a puff I can tell you) the rear wheel is right off the ground. This is an appalling technical design fault and needs to be remedied at once, through a recall at the very least.

The rear wheel is hung on with just a few bolts open to easy access. I am very worried that when I am away anyone could just remove the wheel and have it away. At least proper motorcycles seem to have a chain to hold the rear wheel on, why can't BMW do the same?

What happens when I am asleep in my bed? Anyone could do it and I wouldn't notice until I rode off.

I had thought about leaving the panniers on, weighed down with bricks, as they would at least hold the rear wheel on the ground, making a thief's job more difficult. But that only lifts the front wheel off the ground and a thief will steal that. The front wheel security is dreadful, even fewer bolts than the back and very small at that. Do BMW not know how important a front wheel is? When that is off, I think the front will drop down and the back wheel come up, again. Am I right? It is a very worrying position to be in.

Do BMW not have any common sense? This is an expensive around the world motorcycle but badly let down by shoddy design. I often leave my motorcycle unattended for up to 20 minutes in Tesco's carpark, who knows what could happen? I wish I had thought about it before I had bought it. I bet they hope people steal the wheels, as we will have to buy news ones. How much are they, by the way and where can I get them? Maybe I should carry a spare, does anyone do that? Pictures, please so I can see.

Is everyone's bike like this, or just mine?

Does anyone have any ideas?

YOU GUYS ARE NOT THINKING STRAIGHT WHY CARRY ENOUGH BRICKS IN TEH PANNIER, WHEN YOU COULD JUST CARY BEER TINS - ONCE YOU HAVE PARKED YOUR BEAST ON ITS CENTER STAND DRINK THE BEER AND CRUSH THE TINS AND PLACE UNDER TEH REAR TYRE, THSI WILL HELP WITH THE PROBLEM AND ALSO RELEIVE ANY STRESS ABOUT PARKING IN CAR PARKS :-}}

 

[chad]

YOU GUYS ARE NOT THINKING STRAIGHT WHY CARRY ENOUGH BRICKS IN TEH PANNIER, WHEN YOU COULD JUST CARY BEER TINS - ONCE YOU HAVE PARKED YOUR BEAST ON ITS CENTER STAND DRINK THE BEER AND CRUSH THE TINS AND PLACE UNDER TEH REAR TYRE, THSI WILL HELP WITH THE PROBLEM AND ALSO RELEIVE ANY STRESS ABOUT PARKING IN CAR PARKS :-}}

like your thinking NO NEED TO SHOUT ABOUT IT THOUGH

 

[(RIP) Miff]

I'm afraid I can't comment about the Tesco problem, as we aren't allowed a Tesco in Sheringham (google SCAMROD for details (and you thought BMW were old fashioned)) I can comment on the shopping/parking/wheel theft problem in Morrisons.

I avoid any chance of my wheels getting stolen by using the drive through. This is a wonderful idea, and if you purchase the TouraTech BMW 1200gs Trolley adaptor, then you can not only do a whole months worth of shopping, but also you don't need to empty the bricks out of your panniers to make room. Just make sure to return the trolley afterwards, otherwise you can't get your TouraTech Trolley Token (£44) back.

I do get some funny looks whilst shopping, and also whilst returning home with a trolley being pushed at 60mph. Morrisons have never complained about my helmet, but then I suppose it's difficult to see it under my twat suit.

If you DO try this at your local Morrisons, avoid the fish counter, as that fool Richard Hammond will likely as not knock you off. Bloody accident prone numpty.

PS. Be careful going around the end of the aisles. This is where the special deals are, and you wouldn't want to mis them, would you??

 

[Wapping]

Dear Wapping, make sure you take a suitable tactical hunting knife with you, make sure that it has blood channels included in the design (I think I saw one for sale from a fellow Wanchor), he seemed to have a lot of encouragement regarding this. This may prove useful for removing those special star thingies on the wheel, but I feel would be better used on the oiks who would take the wheel in the first place.

Also, I was worried about the angle of the bike whilst on the side stand, but after searching on this site that the engine is very lean (although my bike leans aswell - is it broken?), and someone recommended getting a power captain to assist with the lean, however, I haven't noticed any decrease in the angle. Someone else suggested getting a different map, and I thought of you, so I got one of Wales. I can let you have a look if you like.

This is excellent stuff. Thank you for listening and understanding the various issues. Thank you too for saving me the time of looking elsewhere. Please come back if you can give me any more help with leaning as I have just encountered counter steering for the first time.

I was out looking for bricks and trying to find anyone with a starry bolt key, when a fellow biker shouted out, "Look at the counter steering on that bike...." Well, he obviously knows more about it than me, I thought.

At least I think it was counter steering he shouted out. It's so difficult to hear sometimes above the clattering of the engine. Are they ALL this noisy, or is it just me?

Either way, it's nice to be recognised by a fellow biker, no matter what. That's two in as many days being cheery. Mr Steve Toe (thanks again for the brick, mate!) and now another biker. Was it you, 11:30 down my road? It would be great to say, "Hi" if it was.


PS I have just found the funny faces and discovered that it's possible to and in a sentence.... There are more, but they are hidden away. That's fun It's great being a biker.

 

[Ogmios]

i need help with counter steering....
once we're in the bloopermarket - i cant get Mrs Og away from the cheese counter.
sorry - off topic.
i shall ban myself for a week.

 

[Wapping]

i need help with counter steering....
once we're in the bloopermarket - i cant get Mrs Og away from the cheese counter.
sorry - off topic.
i shall ban myself for a week.

Hi mate,

That made me laugh

I think you will enjoy the GStric section of this website, they talk about food there. Have you seen it? If not I have helped a fellow biker


There is also a special section for people from Ireland, too.

It's great just exploring around this club but it's getting me no closer to finding enough bricks or the starry bolt key .

 

[earthmover]

I noticed this security design flaw with the wheels some time ago, and to counter the problem I now take both wheels off when I park in my garage.

As you can see, with both wheels off the bike it sits perfectly upright on what is I believe called the "Bash plate".
I also removed both the seats to further disuade anyone from stealing my pride and joy. This did lead to the battery being exposed, but as I have heard that these are rubbish, and need to be connected to an "Optician" all the time, then I don't suppose there is much chance of anyone stealing it.
My only worry now is that I may be using the wrong method of picking the bike back up again. I currently ask two helpful chaps from the garage down the road to help, but they seem to be more reluctant than they were at first. It's just as well I don't go out much, or they may start asking for money.
HTH
Mark

 

[Wapping]

Mark,

That is very irresponsible

You have now shown a million thieves that it is indeed easy to steal the wheels, confirming all that I feared.

MODS PLEASE REMOVE ASAP


But, from stupidity something good may come.

You must have a starry bolt key DON'T LOSE IT!

They are very difficult to find.

It's easier to find bricks; I am now up to two. A nice builder offered one in my direction when I commented on him showing his bottom crack in public and pointed him in the direction of a local tailors. One good turn, deserves another as my mother says....and how right she is.

 

[buzzman]

Why not load it onto a trailer get the fairy godmother to drive you to Tesco's whilst you sit on the bike that way you can fend off any would be rear wheel thieves